Penguins, peach cobbler and pizza - that's April
BURTON W. COLE, Editor
By Burton W. Cole
April Showers bring Santa Marias.
No, wait, that’s not right. Wrong ship. Wrong voyage.
It’s the Mayflower — April showers bring May flowers. Or possibly Pilgrims.
April harbors a cargo load of odd events, holidays and commemorations.
The month begins with April Fool’s Day and doesn’t let up all the way to Hairstyle Appreciation Day on April 30.
What should you be celebrating in April? Let’s flip through the calendar pages of offbeat events and party.
April 1 — International Fun at Work Day and National Walking Day. If you’re not having fun at work, just walk away.
April 2 — National Peanut Butter and Jelly Day. It’s what’s for lunch if you’re still at work.
April 3 — National Walk to Work Day. But it’s also Don’t Go to Work Unless it’s Fun Day. Stay home with your PBJ, perhaps?
April 4 — Hug a Newsman Day. Here I am! It’s also World Rat Day. Just a coincidence.
April 5 — Deep Dish Pizza Day. I can support that.
April 6 — Plan Your Epitaph Day. Because you might not care for what your family has to say about you.
April 7 — No Housework Day. I celebrate this one most every day.
April 8 — Zoo Lover’s Day. Let’s all skip work and go to the zoo. Unless you work at the zoo. Then by all means, go to work.
April 9 — National Unicorn Day. Be sure to hug a unicorn today.
April 10 — It’s both National Farm Animals Day and National Siblings Day. It’s still not a good idea to call your sister a cow and your brother a pig.
April 11 — Today doubles as Eight-Track Tape Day and National Submarine Day — possibly because you need a submarine to unbury all the eight-track tapes. They’re down there with all the Walkmans, slide projectors and BetaMax machines.
April 12 — What is it with all the walking this month? Now it’s Walk on Your Wild Side Day. It’s also Big Wind Day. Lace up the walking shows and cue Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band’s “Against the Wind” on yesterday’s eight-track.
April 13 — It’s National Peach Cobbler Day and Scrabble Day. Try not spill peach goop on your letter tiles.
April 14 — Ex-Spouse Day. Is it coincidence that it’s also International Moment of Laughter Day?
April 15 — It’s the trifecta of Rubber Eraser Day, Take a Wild Guess Day and the due date for your taxes. I think there’s a connection here. Oh, and it’s also That Sucks Day.
April 16 — Since it’s the day after the IRS deadline, today marks Bean Counter Day and Stress Awareness Day. Any guesses why?
April 17 — I love this one: Blah, Blah, Blah Day. Whatever, dude.
April 18 — TODAY is Husband Appreciation Day — not April 1 like some of you wives suspected. Plus, it’s Newspaper Columnists Day. What a great day!
April 19 — National Hanging Out Day. Just chill, baby.
April 20 — It’s Lookalike Day. My guess is that it’s sort of like dressing up for Halloween, but without the candy.
April 21 — Celebrate National Library Workers Day by finally digging that overdue book out from under the bed and returning it.
April 22 — National Jelly Bean Day. Nah. Wake me when it’s Chocolate Day.
April 23 — National Zucchini Bread Day, because you’re not yet being bombarded with bags of zucchini from all your gardening friends.
April 24 — Because I Can Day. It’s also Pig in a Blanket Day. Why? Because we can.
April 25 — World Penguin Day. Waddle on, my friends.
April 26 — National Pretzel Day. That’s OK, but I’m holding out for Chocolate Chip Cookies Day.
April 27 — Tell a Story Day. “Well, boss, I’m three hours late today because…”
April 28 — Kiss Your Mate Day, Great Poetry Reading Day and International Astronomy Day. Hmm. Kisses. Poetry. Stars. Sounds more like Feb. 14 to me.
April 29 — National Zipper Day. Check ’em against embarrassment.
April 30 — And that brings us to Hairstyle Appreciation Day, which for my mom was any day that I remembered to comb mine.
Have a glorious April folks. And watch out for the Mayflower.
Check your dates with Burt at news@falmouthoutlook.com.